I hope you're ready for some serious heartache. The following story is true. I've changed a few names and locations to protect people's pride. It's such a weird tale that you'll be loathe to believe it at times, but I assure you it is recounted just as it was told to me by all the people involved. This story is called (in my best redneck accent) 'The Fart What Had Ruined A Man's Life'. This story tells the tale of a guy named Eric. He's from my home town, he grew up about a mile from me. The night I met him I watched him bone a fat ugly girl on the filthy carpet in his shitty apartment.

Here comes my friend Adam, drunk as shit, doing his best to make it all the way through Max Romeo's Classic; I Chase The Devil. He's a trooper.

YES! This week's installment of Joe Preston's always awesome internet radio show, F that S, is dedicated entirely to the mellotron. Birmingham England's finest crash happy 500lb tape-based sample and playback synthesizer was a staple in the world of prog rock and Joe digs deep into the crates to bring you damn near two hours of fantastic fantasy jams.



I'm starting to think that there isn't anything that Joe Preston can't do.

I've been busy as hell. My job (hooray again for being employed!) has been hectic, but I had three days off from my regular job so I could have three consecutive long days working as production manager for three venues for MusicfestNW. I spent a ton of time running around between Ash Street, Dante's, & Berbati's paying bands, organizing festival volunteers, crushing uppity doormen, solving logistical problems, and generally trying my best to kick ass.


Along the way I got to work with some great bands whose music I've enjoyed for quite a while (Red Fang, Saviours, Mudhoney were particulary awesome) and some that I had not previously been familiar with (Black Whales, Diesto, and Rabbits just to name a few).

There were quite a few things to see and hear during the festival so click on for an eyeful of rock.

I love stoner metal, you love it too. But, while we're all listening to The Sword and Electric Wizard these days, it's a good idea to look back and see where it all came from. We're all very familiar with Black Sabbath's entire catalog. Much has been said about their contributions to modern music, but they didn't get started in earnest until the 1970 release of their first album. Black Sabbath was really stoked on another band that had gotten big a few years earlier called Blue Cheer. Let's have a look at them playing the Eddie Cochran number Summertime Blues to see what it was that got black sabbath so fired up.


It's got all the earmarks of modern stoner metal; bass heavy production, extended weird jam in the middle of the song, exactly zero hits on the high hat, and ferociously loose drumming... not to mention all the band members having their faces obscured by their hair. You could pull these guys out of this video and stick them in an opening slot for Danava and no would would suspect they were from 40 years ago.

Let's have a listen to Just a Little Bit from Blue Cheer's 1968 release titled OutsideInside. The copy I have is mostly beat to shit so it's off to youtube for this one.

the only thing that differentiates this from modern stoner metal is that it's a bit faster. Just a little bit, but enough to notice. Even the double tracked washed out solo is spot on. Just about two minutes in, things get perfect though. If you smoke weed, I highly (no pun intended) recommend that you get high as shit and jam this tune over the headphones. Your brain will thank you for it later.

So go ahead, pick up Vincebus Eruptum and Outsideinside, and get in touch with your stoner metal roots. You'll be fully prepared the next time some dumbass tries to tell you that it all started with black sabbath.

The Dude sent me a nice present today. A few packs of Yo! MTV Raps trading cards. Entertainment weekly seemed pretty fond of them way back in 1991. I can see why: these things are pretty funny. Being laid out on the scanner next to each other might be the closest Vanilla Ice ever got to Public Enemy.






Pronounced with an Umpty.

Peep them all in giant size in my flickr stream!

All this talk about stuff that happened 10 years ago must have done something odd to my brain. I woke up with this song stuck in my head and it's been there all day. So how about we all enjoy it for a few minutes. It features a tiny cameo by every hipster's favorite rapper; Lil' Wayne.

Juvenile - Back That Azz Up.

It's easy to admire clever bits or architecture. So hop on over to infrastructurist.com and check out their Field Guide To Freeway Interchanges. And then check out Part Two. I'm sure my fellow Pallet Appreciators will really enjoy it.

I'm partial to The Clovermill, which one do you prefer?

Mr. A Pimp Named Slickback is here to help out all you fellas suffering from bitch dependency.

I don't agree with Mr. A Pimp Named Slickback's point of view on the matter, but his delivery gets 10 out of 10 points for style. Thanks to Sol for turning me on to this one.